I am so blessed and grateful for my “close call”. I have learned so much from the experience and it has challenged me to draw closer to Jesus and to deal with some insecurity issues that I’ve had lurking in my heart and mind from many years ago. I honestly thought that I had dealt with the wounds and betrayals of my 20s and was over and done with them. It took meeting someone with major potential for them to come flooding back. Funny how that works?!

Since I obviously don’t want these issues tainting any future relationships, I have been seriously pressing into the Lord and doing a lot of coaching to help release me from these recurring insecurities.

During this time of growth, I’ve been reminded of this song by Hillary Scott & The Scott Family called  “Beautiful Messes”. You can listen to it here but I have included some of the lyrics below…

“Are you spinning in a lie that keeps on telling you that you’re not good enough?

When you’re looking in the mirror, do you see someone impossible to love?

Full of fragile broken pieces

We’re all rough around the edges

We ain’t perfect, no

We ain’t even close

We got holes in our hearts

We got scars we don’t show

But all that baggage we keep on dragging around

Ain’t it time we start laying it down?

Lay it down at the foot of the cross

Give it to the One who can carry it all

Even at our worst, to Him, we ain’t lost causes

Just beautiful messes”

So I am embracing my “beautiful mess” and laying down my insecurities before the Lord and praying for them to be used for my benefit and His glory. I am so thankful that these struggles emerged so that I can deal with them/give them up to God and know that I am secure in Christ and His unfailing love for me. I want to encourage you to ask God to show you where you may have past hurts/issues lurking so that you can surrender them up to Him too. It’s so important for your future relationships.

Blessings,

Angela